Letters to Salima (2)

 Dear Salima,

Things are ever changing. The stars are not aligned for the world this year it seems (what I have learned from watching Indian Matchmaking).  

I have moved out of Wales. Me and Noor have been living together for just over a week. I have taken a month off in August. I am about to start specialty training in September which is what the last 4 years of my life have been leading to.

 

It’s all rather exciting. Moving to a new city (just by the beach, Muscat vibes minus the heat and karak). Reunited with Noor (yes, we are annoying each other 24/7 but how boring would it be if we got along all the time). 

July has been such a good month. I have been overwhelmed by the kindness of people at work when I was leaving. Eid came by, but instead of looking at it that I was spending it away from home and family, I felt grateful for spending it with my second family in the small town I was in. Leaving Wales was difficult but I felt really loved. 

I do miss home immensely. 

Things I appreciate about myself:

1. I am straightforward. Although, I can be that to a fault. But I have come to see it as a positive. I don’t know how to lie even if my life depended on it. 
2. I am passionate. About anything and everything.
3. Figuring out how to adult. I am starting to get the hang of it and force myself to do all the boring tasks that need doing. (Noor will disagree and say she did the flat hunt and all that needed doing for our move)

PS. Your stories on social media always bring me joy. You also add class to my timeline. 

Yours forever and ever,

Huda

Letters to Salima (1)

Dearest Salima (and Noor),

Greetings from Wales. Ramadan Kareem.

Hope you are well and taking care of yourself during this lockdown and Ramadan. 

Even though you described your letter/blog to be short, but it is so full of emotions. Even though you said "enough about me", we can never have enough of you. Somehow the bits you thought were about you were actually you thinking about others, and that is how I've always seen you: so selfless. 

I am sorry about your friend. I do understand where you are coming from, perhaps it is for all of us to live more each day and try and make the lives of those surrounding us better. And perhaps forgive ourselves when we don't tick off all the things we want to do and the things we want to be. Let us be easy on ourselves when we don't have the energy to fight it all. 

Yes and yes. I sell myself short and I feel under appreciated at times. I have felt replaceable lately as I have been asked to move to a different hospital in view of shortage of staff. It wasn't the fairest of situations and I am still not over it. But I am doing my bit to help. 

It is almost 11pm here. I have been off for a few days. I have been reading. I have taken up home workouts. I have attempted mandazi and failed. I am planning to try it again. I have taken up Spanish on Duolingo. I have been on-and-off affected and down because of this lockdown but then I try and count my blessings. I am trying to boast to make my days not feel like a waste. 

The main thought I think that has been constantly playing in my mind is my family. This lockdown has accentuated the distance between me and my family. I am glad me and Noor got to see everyone before all the travel restrictions. I am scared for family, my parents to be specific. I try to push these thoughts away, but this won't be a letter from the heart if I didn't share this thought. And perhaps in sharing it, I can try and push it back for awhile now. 

What has been helping you to get through these difficult times?

Thank you for the first letter and this initiative. I am looking forward to the next one.

Yours,

Huda